It is always easier to be forgiven than to forgive. It is harder still when someone who has hurt you never apologizes, making it difficult to heal and move on.
Luckily there are ways to heal and forgive in a manner that allows you to find closure for yourself. Here are four easy ways to do this.
1. Rewrite the experience
Scientific studies have proved that role-play is a good method to use in helping those suffering from PTSD.
You can either physically recreate the incident that caused you pain or just mentally visualize it. Only this time, imagine that everybody acted in a supportive, caring manner, or that they apologized.
Make it feel real, analyze and accept the emotions you feel. Formulate your own response. You can also type or write out this scenario. Just remember to be in tune with your feelings.
2. Let it go
Holding on to old resentments is like constantly reopening the same old wound. The person who hurt you then will have the power to hurt you years later even if they don’t intend to.
Imagine that a power cord is connecting you to that person and draining the goodness in your life. Then imagine yourself severing that connection.
Do this in a peaceful, comfortable location with your eyes shut. Say to that person, “I release you and I forgive you, and we are both free now”.
3. A letter that you will never send.
An old but effective exercise, this helps us when we are regretting all the things we did not say. Write a letter with everything you’ve always wanted to tell that person. Don’t stop till there is nothing to say.
When you’re done, carry it to a safe spot and destroy it. Say around, “I forgive you and release this hurt from my mind, body, spirit, and life”.
4. Forgiveness is good for your health
Carrying old grudges around will only cause you more pain. The person who hurt you in the first place will have moved on. It doesn’t impair them in any way.
Don’t let anyone hold that sort of power over you. You’ll be wasting your precious life on this planet by doing so. Let go of these old wounds and live a free, happy and healthy life.
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