Do you want to know about a simple and a powerful tool for a committed relationship?
Then, here is one for you. Anyone can try it and they will see how beautiful their relationship will become.
Do you know what true love is?
Well, it is the ability to help each other grow. True love is a feeling that heals all the wounds from the past and makes your life complete again. True love can act as the missing part of your life. True love will give you immense support and you will end up achieving whatever you want to.
This achievement will not only be material but it will also be in terms becoming a better person. This means that true love will challenge you and force you to be a better person than before.
If true love is so beautiful, why don’t we all have it?
This is basically because all of us have very big egos. And the worst part is that we let our egos come between us and our partners. This is not cool because this takes away our shot at true love. Also, all of us have a protection mechanism.
The moment we feel that someone is attacking us, our protection mechanism starts lashing out. Our protection mechanism acts so fast that we forget to think first. This leads to a lot of problems in the relationship. So our body and our mind can create a defense against a perceived slur faster than we can cognitively describe.
The moment we react against the people we love, we disconnect from them. We damage and rupture the beautiful bond between our partners which ends up hurting us more than healing us. Thus the purpose of a relationship is totally defeated.
You know what’s the most challenging part?
The more intimate we are, the more we know our partners. This results in us tuning ourselves and our reactions even faster than before. Thus, it is just an endless cycle of fights and arguments which have no sense and no logic at all.
It’ not worth it, believe us!
Here are the six color code of love we use, with a shirt-hand of what it means; and the long-hand conscious explanation that nobody has time for in the moment!
The 6 Color Code of Love
Color Code of Love – Pink: “Ouch, that hurt.”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: Something in what you said or did felt like it transgressed a boundary. I am fully willing to know that that might be my stuff; or a combination of yours or mine. In the meantime, I am sensitive and could get reactive. Please do your best to empathize with me and validate my feelings. I will own them later. For now, please help me reconnect with you because I really want to.
Color Code of Love – Red: “Back off!”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: I am very reactive. Back off as things could get intense. I know this is my stuff, but I need your help not to blow up or shut down. Do whatever you can to help me, not because you have to, but because you love me. We can unpick the triggers later when I am back to feeling calm.
Color Code of Love – Blue: “Just do what I ask please.”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: For whatever reason, this is really important to me. We don’t have time for a full discussion on this. For now, it would work great for me if you could go with it and we can talk about it all later. I know this could be one of my foibles, but I really would value your support right now.
Color Code of Love – Black: “I’m sad.”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: Please give me a hug and / or nurture me in the way you know I like. Something has triggered a wound and I am finding it hard to share what or how. I am feeling raw. Know that I am working on it, processing it, to be free of it. In the meantime, please just be there for me.
Color Code of Love – Orange: “I need space.”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: For whatever reason, I am feeling attacked or afraid. I need some space or time to understand what is happening. I know it is my responsibility to come back into connection when I am done. I will be back within 24 hours. Please don’t react in that time. Trust me.
Color Code of Love – Purple: “I am down on myself”
What you are consciously communicating without saying it: I have an internal dialogue where I am criticizing myself about something. It’s not you, it really is me. I am having trouble loving myself; and therefore you. I am not sure I can accept love from you. This is my stuff but I know sometimes I take it out on you; or it feels like I am not loving you fully. I don’t want to do that, so it may be best to leave me be while I work on this.
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